The Baby Trials

The Truth Comes Out

>> Thursday, December 17, 2009

Ok I'll admit it: I got blogging cold feet. I read so many blogs each day that I started to feel like I wouldn't measure up. Oh the pressure!

I started the blog to chronicle our new life with Bailey thinking it might give me lots of ideas for posts. Clearly, I didn't know her all that well then. I had visions of her being incredibly intelligent and letting herself out to fetch my paper in the morning before I even get up. Perhaps that was a bit outlandish. First of all, she sleeps in a locked grate (for good reason I might add) so I would have to add that she would first need to unlock herself from the grate before she could even work on maneuvering the door. And second, I don't even have a paper subscription, not a tangible one at least: Hello 21st century online reading! It turns out she isn't incredibly intelligent. I would suggest more of an average intelligence, whereas she knows where the treats are and how to get them. I'm pretty sure that's the extent of average puppy intelligence!

Ok, so maybe if she wasn't intelligent, she'd at least be amusing. Well if you find ripping a new library book to shreds, and scattering it around the only room in my house that has carpet amusing, then she is! Or maybe you might find my extensive, semi expensive shoe collection complete with puppy teeth marks amusing. Or maybe her favorite game of "Chase Me" that left me outside in the cold for an hour when she magically got off her leash, might amuse you!

She's a handful. That's about the best way to sum it up. A wonderfully cute, occasionally cuddly, anger inducing, average intelligence, handful of pure love!

Point is, I'm going to try this thing again, but perhaps you'll end up with the mindless ramblings of life at Portobello Estates rather than the daily snippets of my intelligent and amusing dog. For the record, we are of average intelligence and not amusing in the least, so lower those expectations people! Just kidding...maybe!

Bailey's First Vacation

>> Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Just back from vacation...ahh vacation! Have lots of photos of Bales at our cottage to share soon!
She loved the freedom, and we survived her badness, barely!

Here are a few things Bailey learned this past week:

1. Sit (and how this results in treats!)
2. Very swift chicken stealing techniques!
3. The wonders of people food (see number 2)
4. How its no fun to be locked in a bathroom as punishment (see number 2)
5. Bathrooms and more specifically toilets can be lots of fun and refreshing (see number 4)
6. It's really hard for Kate to punish me if she is peeing herself laughing (see number 5)

It was a big week! Back soon with pics!

Human Chew Toy

>> Thursday, July 2, 2009

I was told to expect this. She will chew everything. Anything and everything she can put in her mouth, she will chew. I had prepared myself for this. Despite the fact that we just bought all new furniture, I had come to realize that a few chew marks would just add character. I'm sure there will be babies in our future and that couch will come to see much worse.

But little did I know, I was to become her favorite chew toy. Picture this. 5:30 in the morning. M has just left for the day, and Bailey makes it know that sleepy time is over. Cut to 5:45 am: Me running down the hall in my fuzzy pink bathrobe, screaming at the puppy foaming at the mouth behind me as she POUNCES at my ankles. And it's not just my ankles that she loves, she also loves my wrists, and has developped a palate for any of my facial features (i.e. nose, chin, lips, etc.).

Now I know I am to be firm, and I am. I have actually practiced numerous ways of saying no. I've tried the spray bottle method (which she loves), I've tapped her on the nose, I have screamed in pain, I've pretty much done everything minus curling up in a ball in the corner, rocking myself to my happy place. Ok, I may have done that as well, but you have no idea how evil she really is!

I've asked for wisdom from co-workers. "This too shall pass" they say as they go to that zen place in their mind where there dog obeys all commands, including starting the morning java before they rise. Yeah right. I'll believe that when I see it. For now I'm forced to go to work wearing long sleeves and pants in the summer to hide the shame.

Did I mention that Bailey is entirely too cute to be even remotely mad at?